How to Use a Kindness Ritual in the Living Room

The Kindness Tree is a ritual that helps the family focus on kind and helpful acts, operating on the Conscious Discipline powers of Attention (what you focus on, you get more of), Unity (we are all in this together), and Love (seeing the best in others).

In the living room, we see a Kindness Tree. The Kindness Tree is a symbolic way to record kind and helpful actions. Family members place leaves or notes on the tree to represent kind and helpful acts. Parents can notice these acts by saying, “You __(describe the action)__ so __(describe how it impacted others)__. That was helpful/kind!” For example, “Shubert helped Sophie get dressed so we would be on time for our library playdate. That was helpful!”

The Kindness Tree will grow with families like Shubert’s who have children of mixed ages. Initially, young children simply put a leaf on the tree to represent kind and helpful acts. As children grow and learn to write, the ritual evolves to include writing the kind acts down on leaves or sticky notes. A Kindness…

Tree template is available as a digital download in our Premium Resource Toolkit.

Another symbolic way to implement a Kindness Ritual would be to place an artificial flower in a pot or vase each time a kind act occurs. (For demonstration purposes, this method is shown in the Bug Family’s dining room, but a real home would use only one type of Kindness Ritual.)

Families with older children can simply use a Kindness Notebook to record kind acts and read them aloud daily or weekly.