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Five Steps to Self-Regulation Icons

Self-regulation is essential for social, emotional, academic and life success. Help coach children in the five-step process with these icons for I Am, I Calm, I Feel, I Choose and I Solve.

Self-regulation is the cornerstone skill for all development. It refers to both the conscious and unconscious processes that allow us to regulate our thoughts, feelings and actions in service of a goal. The five-step process for self-regulation is based on Conscious Discipline principles and is presented in detail in Managing Emotional Mayhem: The Five Steps to Self-Regulation, and in the Feeling Buddies Self-Regulation Toolkit for Parents and the Feeling Buddies Self-Regulation Toolkit for Educators. The five steps are I Am, I Calm, I Feel, I Choose and I Solve.

The objectives for children when conducting the five-step self-regulation process are:

To recognize they have been triggered and take themselves to the Safe Place.
To begin calming themselves enough to identify the feeling they are experiencing.
To select the appropriate Feeling Buddy, naming the emotion and then helping the Feeling Buddy regulate its emotion, creating self-regulatory inner speech for themselves.
To choose calming and/or engaging strategies in order to shift from an upset state to an optimal learning state.
To learn how to address the upsetting event with lifelong problem-solving skills.

Use these five downloadable icons as helpful visual reminders for you and your children as you work to master the transformational five-step self-regulation process. Post visuals where you will use them most—in your Safe Place, taped to your desk and in high-traffic areas. Create books with the icons and illustrations or photos of children demonstrating how to do each step.

We encourage you to share these materials with others, but please respect our copyright by only using the content in its entirety. You may use the whole image only, and all identifying marks (company name, website, etc.) must remain intact.