The Connected Family
Tired of hearing, “What do I get if I’m good?” or “I don’t have to and you can’t make me.” Ever thought if, I had done that or if I had said that to my parents they would have killed me? What on earth is going on with our children, with our families and more importantly, how do we right this ship?
A connected family represents a healthy family. Healthy families have at their core commitment, trust, communication, and managing conflict. A healthy family today is built through healthy relationships. Most of us are neophytes when it comes to relationships. They are historically new as the building block for solid families. Even just one to two generations ago, families were built on roles. Division of labor and power was the cornerstone of the household. Mothers did X, Fathers did Y and children were to be seen but not heard. All the family decisions were made by the one in charge, the remaining members had no voice. The decade of the sixties, was a culminating time when these roles were questioned and the stereotypical roles of families began to unravel. Now families must stay together not because of assigned roles or power but through the quality of the relationships. Sadly, most of us had limited models of what healthy relationship sounds like, looks like and feels like. Divorce rates skyrocketed and children demanded a share of the household power. Times changed and for many our skill set did not upgrade to meet the challenge.
The Connected Family creates healthy relationships between parents, between parents and children, between siblings, and between extended family members and the community at large.
The good news is that the seven skills of Conscious Discipline you will use to guide your children to being successful are the same skills needed to enhance relationships. The Conscious Discipline Brain State Model will help you understand the science behind behaviors that will serve you well in any chosen field of work. The Seven Powers for Conscious Adults will highlight for you your ineffective behavioral patterns that get in your way of being successful at whatever you do. The Conscious Discipline program is a 3 in 1 powerhouse. Discipline your children in such as they become self-disciplined, improve all your relationships with adults and children, and become successful in your career. The catch in this wonderful news is you must have an authentically connected family base from which all this manifest.
Connection, not attention, is what all people seek. Loving moments of genuine connection literally wire the brain for impulse control and willingness. The biochemistry of love allows us to move beyond power struggles to a willingness to cooperate, fosters forgiveness instead simply trying to forget, and provides the willingness needed to repair ruptured relationship moments.
The Connected Family is fostered through predictable routines, nurturing rituals and specific Conscious Discipline structures in the home.
The Connected Family creates a fundamental shift of power in our homes. All members in the family are empowered to have their needs met and a voice, not the final voice, but a voice. We must leave coercion, fear and external rewards behind, and step into a new worldview where intrinsic motivation, helpfulness, problem-solving and connection govern our homelife. We move from attempting to control our children and make them behave to helping them be successful in following the rules. We move from correction to connection from compliance to alliance. All else falls in place!